My sister has shown her true colours since our mum's death
11th July 2021

DEAR DEIDRE: SINCE my mum’s death, my sister has shown her true colours and I have realised how much I dislike her.

I’m a 49-year-old man and she’s 42. She’s always been insensitive and arrogant, but Mum’s death has shown me how unpleasant she is. 

Grieving has been tough as I was very close to Mum. My sister has made comments like “I don’t do tears” and refuses to help me care for our Dad. She criticises the way I live my life, and tells me I’m weird and don’t have many friends. 

Last week, she spotted a bottle of gin on my kitchen table, tutted, and later posted a leaflet about alcoholism through my letterbox.

I am not a confrontational person but this is causing me a lot of unnecessary anguish.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your relationship with your sister sounds damaged. It’s possible she was jealous of your relationship with your mother and is now getting her own back.

You need to tell her that her behaviour is unacceptable and set some boundaries between you. My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself should help.

If she won’t treat you with kindness and respect, cutting her out of your life might be for the best.

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